I often describe the early years of motherhood as a maze. A fun adventure with twists and turns, but also with lots of potential for losing your way, conflicting choices and regularly running into dead ends.

We’ve all had it, that nagging feeling that we’re not doing it right, or that we should be doing more of this, or less of that. The fear that our choices are going to harm our children in some way.

#mumguilt seems so inherently woven into the lexicon of modern motherhood that we just accept it as part of the job description.

Why do we put up this Mask of Motherhood? What stops us from showing our true experience?

It’s no secret that our culture actively rewards mothers for how quickly they can ‘bounce back’ into their old bodies, jeans, jobs and lifestyles.

But here are 3 reasons why I believe it's time to start reframing what motherhood looks like and to question whether bouncing back is a goal we really want to subscribe to.

If matrescence is new to you, it was to me too. Although the term was first coined in the ‘70s by anthropologist Dana Raphael, matrescence is a relatively new way of describing the identity shift a woman goes through when she becomes a mother.